Stu whispered, “Becca, wake up.” Even in sleep, his wife’s face didn’t look very different from the face he’d first made up his mind to get a closer look at in the bookkeeping department of the Morris National Bank. She hadn’t smiled at him then, and she didn’t now. His breath tickled her. She swatted her ear. 

“C’mon, Honey, wake up. Please?” He nudged her shoulder. No response. He nudged her again. 

“What time is it?” she said without opening her eyes. 

“Two o’clock. I can’t sleep. We have to talk.” 

“Go downstairs and have some warm milk. You’ll be asleep in no time. If you still want to talk in the morning, that’s fine by me, but not now. You know how lousy I feel when I don’t get my sleep.” 

“I didn’t just get an urge to chat and wake you, Becca. I’ve been lying here since midnight, thinking, trying not to wake you. But I really need you to listen to me. Not in the morning. Now, Becca!” 

She pushed her pillows up against the headboard and turned her half-closed eyes in his direction. “Okay, okay.” She grumbled. “What has you in such a state at two a.m.?’ 

“Same thing that has me in a state, as you so nicely put it, all day long: working with my father. I have to get out from under him. I can never do a damn thing right in his eyes. Then he complains I don’t do enough. Today was the clincher.” 

“What happened?” she asked without real interest. “And if it was so awful, why didn’t you bring it up last night?” 

“Because you don’t like me to talk business over dinner, that’s why!” 

“Whoa, fella! Don’t go getting mad at me.” 

“Sorry. It’s just that I’ve been bustin’ my ass for this guy since I got out of school, and all it’s brought me is misery, every single goddamn day. Last week, there was a rise in interest rates and he told me to adjust the prime rate up one-percent on all the commercial loans. Well, the damn phones started ringing off the hook because customers were pissed-off at that big adjustment all at once.” 

“So let him handle them. I mean, you did do it because he told you to, right?” 

“Yeah, he told me, all right. Only now he says he told me to adjust the rate by only one-half percent. I know damn well what he said, but he’s just tired of taking all the heat. Well I’m tired, too. Sick and tired of taking heat he’s responsible for. And I’m sick and tired of taking all the other shit he tosses at me on a daily basis. I need to be my own person, Becca, and he’ll never let me. So I’ve decided we’re leaving here.” 

Becca’s eyes were open all the way now. “And where are we supposed to be going?” she asked in her extra-quiet voice, the dangerous one. 

“Florida. We’re moving to Florida. I called Des at the bank before I left work yesterday, and he wants me with him. No strings attached. He’s looking for someone and he told me I’m his top candidate.” 

“Are you planning to do this on your own?” 

“What do you mean?” 

“I’m not about to leave here in order to trot off to hot, sticky Florida!” she snapped. “Especially not to live near my asshole brother!” 

“This isn’t about your not liking to live near your brother, it’s about my hating to work for my father. It’s a way for me to get out from under him. Besides, it’s a good opportunity for us, for our family. Des was really encouraging. He may not be the sweetest brother-in-law in the world, but he knows what I can do and he says he wants me with him.” 

“Good opportunity for you? I doubt it. But it’s definitely not my idea of a good opportunity for me. First of all, I hate Florida. Second, I hate my brother. Des is nothing but a slick conniver who’s never given a crap about anybody. I know you find it hard to see that your father’s right about anything, but he was right about Des when he was here to dinner last week and said he was a loose cannon bound to do a lot of damage sooner rather than later. You’ve told me yourself that his reputation in your business stinks. From what your father says that’s not a state secret in Florida, either. Maybe you ought to think a little more about why he’s offering you a job.” 

She took a deep breath and squeezed his hand. “I know you’re good at what you do, hon. But Des is only going to use you. He’ll get you into trouble. Mark my words, if you accept his offer, you’ll be sorry, I promise you that,” she said, her voice beginning to elevate to another octave. 

“Now you’re taking my father’s side?” 

“Stu, you know damn well I’m not taking his side. I hate the way your father puts you down nearly as much as you do, maybe more. I know how capable you are and how much he depends on you even though he’d rather die than admit it. But he’s right about my brother. Believe me, I know better than you what Des is like, and I’m telling you, if you do this, you’ll regret it.” 

She sat up straighter against the headboard. “Besides, I don’t have to go down there to know I’d regret it. Stu, this is my home. I can’t just get up and move and upset the kids because your father has treated you like a kid for the hundredth time. Speak up for yourself, goddamnit! Tell him he’s wrong, that you did exactly what he told you to do. Christ, Stu, isn’t it about time you stood up to him?” 

“Don’t you think I have? Many times! He always comes back with some answer—even if he’s making it up right on the spot—that sounds like it’s true. If he can’t think of anything, he falls back on telling me to show him the proper respect. I’m tired, Becca. I’m tired of fighting him all the time and losing, over and over. I want to live my own life and to stop being the tail wagging behind him. I know your brother isn’t the nicest guy, but he’s not my father, literally or figuratively. I can handle him. You must have some faith left in me. I think this is a real opportunity for me. Please, let’s not argue about it anymore. Let’s just go.”  

Becca’s face reddened. She gripped the end of the sheet, squeezing it in her fist until her knuckles stretched the skin of her forehand smooth. “Maybe you didn’t hear me,” she said quietly. “I’m not leaving here on the basis of what you’ve told me. So you make any plans you want to, but if they involve moving to Florida, you’re doing it alone. Now I need some sleep!” 

Flattening her pillows, she slid down between the sheets, turned on her side away from him, obviously hopeful she’d managed to bring the argument to an end. 

“That’s just like you,” Stu said. “Turning your back on me when I need you. You know, Becca, maybe you’ve had it too easy. Maybe you should have worked; maybe then you’d see things more clearly. You have no idea what hell I have to go through every day.” 

Becca glared at him. “I know damn well what you go through each day! God knows you tell me often enough! What beats me is why you do nothing about it. When we hit Florida it won’t be long before you’re bitchin’ about Des—but there, you’ll really have something to bitch about! You think he’s going to give you a nice cushy job so you can strut your stuff, but you’d better think again! He’ll nail your ass to the cross every day, because that’s the kind of Chairman he is. If you can’t stand up to your dad, Stu, forget about being able to hold your own against my dear brother.” 

“Why can’t you understand?” he yelled. “If my father were just my boss, it’d be different! Look, I’ve made my decision. I’m not going to be kissing ass the rest of my life. I’m going and that’s it. If you want to stay here, fine. But you’re my wife, Becca.” 

“Stu, grow up, damn it! You’re in a difficult situation with your dad, but running away isn’t the answer. If you feel you have to run, I guess I can’t stop you. When you stop running, I’ll be here.” She put her head between her pillows, determined to shut him out. 

He spoke loudly and clearly so she would hear every word. “Fine, bury your head. I’m leaving next Friday. I hope you change your mind.” 

Stu shut his eyes, even though he knew sleep would be beyond his reach for whatever was left of the night. He lay there, listening to the irregular beating of his heart, each beat a shard of hope that she’d change her mind and come with him. 

But he knew she wouldn’t budge. By morning, he had convinced himself that maybe some time apart wasn’t such a bad idea. Maybe being on her own for awhile would remind her that being able to count on the person you’d taken marriage vows with was a two-way street. 

That had been five long years ago.